


The Last Scroll   ( Listen to My Story About Gabrielle )

by daviderl



Series: Xena: Warrior Princess [4]
Category: Xena: Warrior Princess
Genre: Other
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-03-09
Updated: 2019-03-09
Packaged: 2019-11-14 12:18:58
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 449
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18052379
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/daviderl/pseuds/daviderl
Summary: A lost scroll written by Gabrielle . . . about Gabrielle,  when Aphrodite put a self-obsession spell on her.





	The Last Scroll   ( Listen to My Story About Gabrielle )

**THE LAST SCROLL**

 

[ "Listen to My Story About Gabrielle" ]

 

 _This, obviously, was not the last  scroll Gabrielle wrote. She and Xena traveled together several more years before that most unfortunate trip to Japa. I suppose it could be called "The Lost Scroll" since, until recently, it was lost to history. But because it_ **is**    _the last one to be found, so far, I have decided to call it "The Last Scroll."_

 

When Xena and Gabrielle were trying to find the Mystic Diamond that Aphrodite wanted for her own, Aphrodite put spell on Xena to make her obsessed with fishing, hoping she would forget about the diamond. She also put a spell on Gabrielle to make her obsessed with herself. (And one on Joxer, which we won't mention – again – ever!)

But unbeknownst to Xena, Gabrielle had written many verses touting her unique Specialness. And just as she was beginning to recite them all, Xena shushed her.

Here, now, are those verses, translated using the most up-to-date computer algorithm available.

 

Well, listen to my story about Gabrielle

A cute little gal that’s lookin’ really swell

Perfect hair, such a lovely lass

Nice round breasts and a firm young ass

 

There is so much to say about Gabrielle

Many, many things needed to tell

I'm quite a beautiful sight, you see

Just by being me, Me, ME!

 

Everyone wants more of Gabrielle

"We can't get enough", they all yell

How very wonderful it would be

If there were three, yes, three of me!

 

So much talent has Gabrielle

Way too much to want to sell

And never, ever would it be lewd

If we three danced in the nude

 

So many skills has Gabrielle.

Even the future she can foretell

So many men will fall at my feet

And even some women. How sweet!

 

All of the gods love Gabrielle

They say, ''On Mt Olympus you should dwell''

But I would never leave my worshipers behind

Though they are dirty, smelly and unrefined.

 

No flower can compete with Gabrielle

Not with its beauty and not with its smell

My skin and hair are wonders to behold.

Worth so much more than silver and gold

 

You don't need to bow to Gabrielle

Not when greeting her and not in farewell

Everyone's the same through and through

Just not as wonderful as You-Know-Who

 

But there is so much more to Gabrielle

More than the body you love so well

When I walk by, no one can think

It's plain their sanity is on the brink

 

So now you know of Gabrielle

With verse after verse you'll often retell

But there's one last thing before it's too late

You should call me 'Gabrielle the Great'!

 

 

 


End file.
